Dad

Today is Pedro Castro's birthday. Well, it's after midnight now so technically it was yesterday. I'm just looking back on the evening and beaming with pride and love and gratitude. My father is truly an inspiration. He has taught me so much about the human spirit. What it means to be gracious and kind and truly loving with your whole heart. The kind of love that is unselfish and always remembers to treat others with respect. That is who he's always been. And today I saw how much this just IS who he is.

In his weakened and sometimes confused mental state, he has no time for being anything more or less than his true self. And today there was so much of him there. Even as he sat in his wheelchair looking slimmer and smaller than he used to, the man inside is still evidently totally there. He was teary eyed and choked up and weepy when he saw how many of his friends came to see him on his birthday. When the singer/guitarist sang for him, he was very touched and cried. And at a couple of points today he tried, even though his speech is not that great yet, he tried to thank everyone. He said that he felt the value everyone felt for him and that he felt the genuine love. And I believe he was truly grateful.

But the moment that really made me see how much of my dad is beautiful despite his recent sickness happened before the party. It's a bit of a difficult story but I want to say it because it says so much about the man I call my father with pride. Mom and I were taking him to the bathroom. From outside, where dad couldn't see her, a girl was giving us instructions on what the easiest way to replace his adult diaper was. Mom and I aren't good at this. The nurse usually does it. She explained an easy way to get the job done. (He has to wear them even though he goes to the bathroom just fine.) Anyway, we did it and we said thank you to the girl for showing us a very easy way to get the job done. As we wheeled dad past this girl, even though he hadn't even seen her, he'd figured out who it was who'd been talking through the curtain and he said "thank you, thank you."

It might seem a little sad to someone reading this. But it made me smile deep inside. Here is this man in what is his weakest hour. He's got his pride. He's not happy that he has to put up with things like diapers and wheelchairs and being in a nursing home. He would rather be healthy again and be home. But he hasn't let all of this get in the way of his ability to thank people when they help him out or help us help him. His spirit of gratitude was not touched by the heart attack or the other injuries. He's still as gorgeous in his soul as he's ever been. And that moment made me realize why he is so loved by so many. So when we went downstairs to greet his friends and he started to cry, I knew it was a well deserved cry for him. He should feel the amount of love we were all giving him. Because through the years he's always given so much to everyone he's ever met. If only by letting them know that they mattered for a few seconds.